Technology/Media and Community
The Latest Buzz
The buzz word today is connect, connected, connection, or some form of the word.
We want to be connected, but to what?
Is it TV, internet, movies, music, books, people, the world around us.
Consider this: Do we really need to be connected that connected? Is there such a thing as being too connected?
What does it really mean to be connected or to connect? When companies talk about a device helping you to connect what are they talking about? How does it help you?
Increasingly to be connected means sharing information or facts. The Internet is a distributer of facts and information with no context. We jump form link to link with no framework, we watch movie clips of people’s lives with no context. Chatting and IM is really about the sharing of facts and information with one another.
Think about this: Has all this technology really helped us to connect in ways beyond people I share information with?
What are the expectations that technology and being connected have placed on us? How has connectivity become our master?
There are now expectations that we must be available all the time, every minute of the day. We carry our computers, our e-mail, our phones with us everywhere. Its harder to get away and its made us dependant on technology.
More Buzz
We are also a world that values speed. We want everything faster, we want it now and we don’t want to wait.
Our news comes to us almost instantly from people at the scene. Our responses are fast almost immediate- texting, chatting, tweets, and more. The speed at which information comes to us is getting faster and faster. A hundred years ago it took weeks to get information from one coast to the other, now it takes a second.
Think about this: Does all this speed have any negative affects? Is all speed good?
This desire for speed has worked its way into our understandings of relationships. Relationships must move fast. There’s no time to get to know one another, we move quickly from liking a person to the physical and the results are wounded lives.
Buzzzzz
Our world is also hungry for community. We desire to connect to people, to feel included, to have a place to belong. We want to have people who know us, whom we know, people who care for us, people who will accept us, people whom we can talk about more than facts and information, but dreams, desires, hopes, and more.
The internet has thousands, if not millions of communities we can connect to. But are these real communities. Will these really satisfy our longings for community?
Think about this: Can something that is designed to relay information and facts really be a source of community, as we desire?
Buzzzing Bees
All this sharing of information, of speed of receiving and sending information out has influenced us in ways we may not be aware of. Information has become power. The person with the most power is the one who knows the most on a group.
Are there any dangers in trying to acquire information?
How might this desire for information affect our relationships with friends and our community?
Our culture is increasingly separated and isolated because we are afraid to share information with one another because we are afraid a person may use the information against us, use it to gain power over others, afraid they may share it with others, or worse. In short we no longer trust people to hold onto our secrets. So when we need some one to talk to, to share what we’re going through, we don’t, we keep it in because there is no one we can trust with our secrets because information is power. There are very few people who we can share information without the fear it will be leaked.
The worst part is the church/Christians are the worst at keeping secrets. We are the bigger gossipers of all. We are the least trusted with secrets because we like the power it gives us in a group.
As a community we are not an exception to this. Every year I talk with people in our own community who are struggling, who are longing for some one to share what they are going through, but they can’t. Because they know that if they tell their “friends” it will soon be spread around the church, to their siblings or parents who will spread it. So they stay quiet and struggle on by themselves. Basically we aren’t trustworthy with information. Every year people know who they have to watch what they share around otherwise it will become the next viral video.
You may not be a trustworthy friend if…
You want to know what’s going on with everyone.
You more concerned with what’s going on with a person when they share they need prayer or are having trouble than really listening to them.
You need to figure it out.
You get offended when they won’t tell you everything.
You over react to every bit of information you get.
You instantly want to share it with someone else-parents, friends, or siblings.
Who do you trust in our group to share your secrets with?
Paradox Exposed
The reality of our world of technology and media is that it has created a paradox. We are more connected to people and the world but at the same time we find ourselves more isolated.
What is required for real relationships/community on the internet? The answer is nothing.
Nothing is actually required of you on the internet or through your phone. You don’t need to be honest, safe, trustworthy, risk, open up, share, care for the other, not asked to forgive, become better, deal with conflict, love, time, or energy.
Relationships through technology require nothing of you. This isn’t community or connecting. It’s the sharing of information, which I can do with anyone- stranger or friend. No real life relationship asks nothing of you! Technology gives us unreal expectations for what is required in real community. Every relationship in real life will ask something of you.
Why do we struggle with living in community and relationships? Because we think real relationships and community are like our virtual communities and relationships.
The Truth About Relationships, Friendships and Community
Everyone one of us was created for community and relationships at many levels. God exists in community in the trinity (Gen 1) and being made in His image we too are created for community-community with God and with one another.
Every one of these will require and have expectations for you.
What are the expectations/requirements to be in these types of relationships?
Time- these don’t always happen on your schedule. You will have to spend time investing in these which means not doing other stuff. They will not always be convenient. Struggles never come when we have time. Building deep relationships take time!
Energy- You will have to put in energy and effort to make relationships happen. You will have to do stuff they want and go places they want to go.
Trust- you must be trustworthy. Things that are told in secrecy must be kept secret. Trust is something you earn but is key to every relationship. When there is no trust there is no relationship. This must be repeatedly shown.
Honesty- You cannot pretend to be some one you are not. You have to be real with one another. Honesty is another key to every relationship.
Care for/love them- You must actually love and care for the people. The Bible has a long list of what love looks like (sacrifices, encourages, protects, hopes, looks out for the other, etc). If you don’t care or love them its not a relationship.
Vulnerable- you will have to open up. But the danger here is open up too much and in the wrong relationship and you will get hurt. Our most vulnerable place should be with God and husband and wife. As girl/boy friend you should never open up to them about everything. There is a thing called progressive revelation. Open up to soon and the relationship doesn’t work out and you will be wounded and hurt. You should look to develop a friendship with on guy/girl you can share the hard stuff in life, who can ask you the hard questions. But this takes time, effort, trust, and honesty.
Take risks- You cannot enter any relationship and not expect to get hurt (see below) or when the relationship ends expect to walk away untouched. Yet there are ways to protect against some of it- being careful how much you open up to a person.
Deal with conflict and forgiveness- We are sinners and we will hurt one another. We will not always agree and we must learn how to forgive and deal with conflict. We cannot throw away friendships when they are inconvenient or when hurt happens. Some we will have to end if the hurt is too great.
The internet/technology requires none of this.
The best way to grow and deepen relationships is with to use the most personal form of communication you have available.
Real communities gather together, they share, pray for, support, encourage, laugh and cry together, help others grow, and learn from one another. Real communities involve our emotions.
Does this J communicate the same as a person’s own smile? Does this L communicate the depth of pain a person may be going through?
If you want relationships/friendships where people ask you questions beyond how are you doing and expect more than the usual responses? This will take time and energy and presence. There are things people will not discuss over texting, video chatting or e-mail, but only over phone or in person.
Do you want people to share what’s going on with them? Then you must prove yourself trustworthy (no gossip) and communicate you care for them as much as you do yourself.
Do you want friendships where people help you grow to become all you can be, who point out things you can’t see in your life both good and bad? Do you want people whom you can bounce ideas off of and not be judged? None of this will happen over the Internet or texting. These kinds of friendships/communities require us to invest in-person as much as possible and when not- over the phone.
Yes later people may ask you stuff over internet or texting if they are in a hurry or can’t talk. But it all happens because of the in person time you have invested.
When you can talk and you text instead it communicates your commitment to that person. When you call instead of meeting when it’s really important it communicates your level of commitment and care. Why?
Scripture
Jesus modeled personal relationships.
Think about it: When Paul wrote about the community of believers he chose to liken it to a body. Why?
Everyone must be physically there. The body can’t be the body if some part is missing. The body must be connected physically to share the joys and pains, to communicate effectively and to grow.
In……..we’re told to not stop meeting together.
What kind of picture does Acts 2:42-47 paint of community?
Our Witness
Our world is longing for community, real friendships and relationships. One of the most powerful tools we have in witnessing to the world is the power of the body of Christ. A community that meets together, that always seeks the most personal form of communication, that chooses the lesser forms only when they have to.
We were created for relationships up close and personal, not at a distance. The virtual community is not real community. It can never substitute for a real community.
When asked if you’ve talked to a friend and you say no but I’ve texted them- we should have warning bells go off, we are losing a relationship, we are isolating ourselves, we’re being tricked to think we’re connected but we’re only distancing ourselves.
And once we’re alone the enemy will strike. This is one powerful reason why we gather and Friday and Sunday. We gather to renew and strengthen relationships, friendships and community.
Relationships are not the result of speed, the exchange of information, or communities that require nothing from us. Relationships will always require time and energy. They will demand us to repeatedly prove ourselves trustworthy and honest. We will have to show we care for them. They always require the most personal form of presence we can give. They will always require something from us.
Media/Technology, Life, and Faith
Stop and Think:
When we talk about media what do we mean? What are some examples?
Defines media as anything that extends ourselves. TV extends our imagination, phones extend our voice, glasses extend our vision, and clothes are extensions of our personalities. Media is far more than just music, TV, or print.
What is technology? What are examples of technology in our lives?
Technology is the means by which media is able to reach us, it what enables us to extend ourselves.
Don’t Stop There- Take The Next Step:
Are media and technology good or bad? Why??
Media is all around us. We are constantly bombarded by media. We are constantly soaking in media through TV, computers, music, billboards, and advertisement. There are few places you can go or escape from media. Yet we are also surrounded and living in an ever increasing technological world. In the past 10 years technology has exploded and invaded every area of our lives it seems.
Often we embrace these things without thinking. Faster computers, ipods, smart phones, connected TV, games, music, movies and more. They can make life more enjoyable, easier, and convenient.
We can’t really avoid them either. Technology will continue to advance, media will surround us more and more.
Reality
Whether we realize it or not media and technology affects how we think and process information and see the world-both parents and teens.
At the turn of the century most people would have no problem sitting for a 2 hour church service or lecture. Today we have about a 30-60 minute attention span. Why did it drop so much? Look to TV, the average TV show is 30-60 minutes.
Your Parents World Verse Your World
Parents
Your parents grew up in a world that was largely print and word based. Newspapers, magazines and books were the primary way information and facts were shared. It took till the 70’s-80’s for TV’s to be common in most homes.
Print and word has shaped how your parents generation looks at the world around them.
Research has shown that the printed word promotes:
Creativity- when you read a book you create the world instead of having a movie show it to you.
Linear thinking and reasoning- we learn to read in a step by step process. Consider the sentence below
The dog is running.
We can only make sense of it by reading left to right. We must put letters together, sounds together to form words, words carry meaning, many words together create whole thoughts. In order to understand the sentence you have to read all of it.
In order to understand things you needed to be a certain age and have certain intellectual abilities. Most kids don’t learn to read till 1st grade and then its simple sentences like the above. As our vocabulary and brains develop we can understand more abstract concepts.
E=mc2 Energy = mass time the speed of light squared.
This sentence only makes sense when at certain ages.
Focus is on facts- We learn to value information and facts.
Ends is important- like reading, we need to get to the end in order to make sense of something. So we must egt somewhere in order for it to have meaning.
Emotion and experience less valued- emotions don’t make sense, aren’t always logical so they are valued less.
Teen World
Starting in the 1990’s and especially in the 2000’s images have replaced words and print media. Magazines and newspapers are dying. Popular sites are image intensive. Images, like words, influence how we think and view the world.
Research has shown that images promote:
Experience- When we see a picture in calls us into the experience and to experience it ourselves
Emotion- Images stir our emotions. Hence the rise of the emotive icons. L J
Non-linear thinking- No longer does one have to put words together to get the idea, no longer do you need to go step by step to make meaning.
Wholistic thinking- cause us to consider the whole situation and not just one specific part. Why do we suddenly care how we are affecting the environment when its been going on for years?
Some Examples: Compare and notice how you react to each
The dog is running.
All we know from the sentence is a dog is running. We don’t know if its running away because its scared or to fetch something. We don’t know if its happy or mad. We don’t know what type of dog and it doesn’t invite us into the world of the sentence.
The image tells us much more. We can see the enjoyment on its face, we see the type of dog, we see it alive and it excites our emotions, we’re drawn into it.
You don’t have to think logically or step by step to understand the picture. The picture causes you to look all around at the same time- at the dog, the greas, the face of the dog, the blurred background.
What do these mean
“L”
The letter L tells us the sound it makes-lllll. We know nothing else from it. Alone it has no meaning.
Yet the L on the right means quality, luxury, expensive, performance, high tech, a life style
If our culture is increasingly image based what are the dangers/challenges it creates for our faith?
Implications to our faith.
There are implications of these to our faith and how we express and experience it. Some assume that as long as we keep the Gospel message the same we can embrace technology while still communicating the same thing. Yet some one has said that the media we use is always the message. The content can easily be undermined by the media if we are not aware of the power of the media and how it affects us.
Examples:
Projecting the Bible verses
Pro: It helps everyone see the verses and be on the same page
Con: It takes us out of the Bible. No longer a need to bring your Bible, to write in it, take notes, or know where things are in it. Your Bible can sit on the shelf.
Projecting a person
Pro- helps people to see the person speaking.
Con- Research has shown our brains have been trained to watch a screen over a person. Our brains actually shut down when we watch a screen, it requires less work to watch a screen than a person. (TV, movies, and computers have trained our brains to be entertained rather than engaged). Also a projected image gives a person more power than they might have in normal life.
Projecting an Image:
Pro- can help us understand a situation or concept. A picture of a person suffering in Haiti communicates more than a sentence saying people are suffering.
Con- If left up to long it can put us in entertain mode and not enter in the suffering of the person.
This doesn’t mean we throw out technology. We need to understand it so that we can control and use media and technology to strength and enforce our message rather than take away from it.
There are more implications to how we experience our faith.
| Parents | Teen |
| Printed word | Image based |
| Logic, reason, abstract | Intuition, experience, holistic |
| Faith is a about presenting facts and making a decision. The end, the decision is what matters most. | Faith is a process and journey. We should embrace and enjoy the journey and walk with people through it. |
| Salvation is a transaction. | Salvation is just the beginning of the process of discipleship. Again the focus on journey. |
| Faith located in ones mind, in the invisible and abstract. Doctrine matters most. | Faith located in the visible and concrete. A faith that is lived out and changes ones life and the world matters. Doctrine is important but not if it doesn’t change a person or the world. |
| Paul’s writing emphasized. They are logical and abstract. | Gospels emphasized. They are about stories, images, and experiences. |
| Worship music not a major medium-the preaching is. Worship music must go some where- logical and orderly. | The experience of worship music is valued. Songs can jump around because its about the experience, about being in God’s presence. |
| Promote individual faith and God | Promote the group experience and moving together. |
Neither side is correct. We need both. Our faith is about doctrine and logic but its also about the experience and it influences our emotions.
As teens and young people we must be aware that in an image driven culture that we are people of the Word. The Bible is our best revelation of who God is and what it means to walk with Him. We must be aware of this and invest time in reading it, studying it, soaking it in. Just because it may not come as natural to the younger generation means we must work harder and be more intentional in this area.
As adults we must realize that there is value in the journey of discipleship and faith. We need to understand and okay with “not going anywhere in a song” and embrace just being in God’s presence and letting him speak. While it may not be our primary mode of relating it is for the younger generation and should not be minimized.
So How Do We Get Along.
I don’t know. Some things that will help is for us to understand and be aware of how others worship and experience God and their faith. We must not judge the other. We must be aware of where we are weak and try to strengthen that area.
I have also read several people, who have looked at this added this:
Worship- music and order and flow of service- become highly sensitive and personal when we are not engaged with God throughout our week, actively living and pursuing God. When the Sunday service becomes our only place we connect with God every week we will of course want it our way and will be willing to die for it.
But when we are all experiencing, living, and pursuing God in our daily life, at work and school and home Sunday is no longer our primary and only place we connect with God. Sunday takes on a new meaning, its where we gather with others to express to God our gratitude for all He’s done during the week. Suddenly an old hym that speaks of God as our fortress sings to our souls because of an experience we had during the week because it felt like everyone was out to get us. Suddenly a modern song where a chorus about God’s love for us is repeated sings to our souls because of our week we need to hear that.
Sunday becomes a place of expressing to God our praise, our tears, our hurts, to God and one another, it becomes a time when we hear again the Good News, hear God calling us as a group to follow Him, and we realize we are not in this fight, this journey alone.
Homosexuality: Part II
Catch-Up from Part 1
Homosexuality is about more than getting the same legal rights as heterosexuals get. It’s a battle of – how we see and interpret the world around us. It’s a spiritual battle about who determines what is right or wrong. Does God determine what’s right and wrong or do humans (in this issue- homosexuality)? And how do we as Christians who are called to stand for truth, to call sin sin also love our enemies, speak the truth in love and grace? How do we live in that tension.
Scripture:
Scripture is clear that when Adam and Eve sinned our whole person was corrupted by sin. This includes our sexuality. Just as every other part of humans has been corrupted so to our sexuality. Our sexuality needs to be redeemed just like all parts our lives. Just like our mouths need to be redeemed from cursing people and things to speaking love and encouragement. Just like our goals in life need to be redeemed from money and power to glorifying God. So to our sexuality needs to be redeemed by God. And just as we cannot redeem the rest of us on our own, just like we need the help of the Holy Spirit in our lives to redeem those areas, so to we need the help of the Holy Spirit to redeem our sexuality.
Why does the church pay so much attention to the sexual sins of our culture while ignoring others?
I do and I don’t know what there’s so much attention given to this topics. We should despise every other sin as much as we do this one- abuse, bad language, disobeying parents, cheating, divorce, drunkenness, greed, pride, lust, etc. All of the sins brought death into the world, any of these sins would have still sent Jesus to the cross. Romans 6:22-23.
Homosexuality is a sin
As much as our world tells us homosexuality is normal and natural it is still sin in God’s eyes. Col 3:1-10 still lists sexual immorality as a sin(Romans 13:11-14. Romans 1:18-32 spells out that God has allowed humans to pursue unnatural relationships with the same sex. Humans were not created to live in a homosexual relationship, its not how God intended us to live.
Marriage is more than just a piece of paper.
Marriage was one of the first things God ordained. Gen 2:18- God ordains marriage between a man and a woman. Its after seeing Adam by himself and saying its not good he creates Eve as his helpmate, not another man. Marriage was not something entered and exited freely. Marriage was a life-long bond. Scripture says what God has joined (in marriage) no one is to separate. Nowhere in the New Testament do authors refer to marriage as between an man and another man or a woman and another woman. When God gives his expectations and roles in marriage its always a husband and wife.
What About Old Testament and all the multiple wives?
It is true we see in the Old Testament people taking more than one wife and we see people divorcing each other. However never does God okay this. In fact Jesus in Matt 19:3-8 says it was because their hearts were hard that Moses permitted it, not God. In other places having more than one wife often gets the person in trouble with God and causes problems- jealous, friction, lies, deceit, murder- in those families. Everything we read about these families is not what God intended for marriages or families to be like.
We Must Trust God Knows Best
When God designed families to consist of one man and one woman we must trust that this is the best way. Since God cannot lie, since everything God does is the best then we must trust that marriage between 1 man and 1 woman is the best condition for everyone involved in the family. Somewhere in the union of a husband and wife, Paul sites, that we receive a picture into the union of God and His church. The family unit as God has defined is the best environment for a child to be raised and we see this supported in research today.
If marriage between 2 men or 2 women was the best then God would have declared that. But He doesn’t. He makes it clear that marriage is to between a man and woman only. Scripture sites that any other arrangement is a sin, and unnatural.
Therefore we must hold to the definition of marriage as God defines it even if it makes us unpopular, even we get called names, even if people don’t like us or hate us because of it.
So What Do We Do?
Jesus tells us to love our enemies. Jesus tells us to not judge unless we want to be judged. Yet Jesus also calls us to stand for the truth, to be like Him who called sin sin.
While Jesus was never afraid to call people on the sin in their lives, he also had the ability to love people while making it clear the way they were living was wrong. Jesus also endured the scorn, hateful words, and looks of people whom he called attention to the sin in their lives. He wasn’t always accepted for his words or stand on cultural issues. But where Jesus contemporaries avoided sinners, label sinners Jesus went in and ate with them, Jesus extended the love of God to them all the while making clear their way of living was wrong.
Clean Up Our Own Homes
Yet today the church has little power or authority to speak on what is best when it comes to marriages. Our divorce rate is the same as the culture around us, our reason for divorcing the same as culture. Our families often do not reflect the values of the kingdom of God. If we want to be the voice that people can listen to and trust then we must get our marriages in line. We must practice what we read in Scripture.
The church should be the place where people go to see what a good marriage looks like, they should be coming to us to see how to do it, but people don’t. We’ve messed up and we need to take a good look at our own marriages if we want our voices to be taken serious.
We must clean up our own marriages and families and model for the world what God intended.
Be Not Afraid to Stand For What Is True.
We must also believe the Word of God is true in all areas of life. And because it is we need not back down from the truth and calling sin what it is-sin. Jesus warned that following him would put us at odds with the world. He warned that people would take us before judges, kings, and other authorities because of what we believe and he tells us to not be afraid.
Learn How To Extend Grace with Truth.
But we must learn how to do this in love and grace. We must never forget that all people are sinners, us included, and that all people are created and loved by Jesus. We must realize that Jesus blood covers all sins. We must not avoid them or ostracize them. We can be in friendships with them but we must always make clear we cannot embrace or accept their life style. This will cause some friendships to be lost, some will say this is part of me and if you reject that part of my life then you are rejecting me. We must be spending time praying for all people, to be free from sin, to come to see and know Jesus.
Reality
This issue like many more in life will cause us to live in tension with the world, with friends and even family members. We face the difficulty of standing for God’s truth in a world when its not popular or liked, yet we are still called to love people, to reach out to them, to spread the Good News. We live in a time of tension- an in between time when the Kingdom of God has come and is breaking in but at the same time has not come in its fullness, in a world where sin still exists but longing for the world where sin will no longer exist.
Homosexuality
The next couple weeks we’ll be looking at some controversial topics in our days. In many ways following Jesus will make us feel like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole. Our culture pushes us to go its way, accept its beliefs, yet what do we do when these beliefs are against the truth of Scripture? How do we reconcile these things when God calls us to love people, to speak out for the powerless, voiceless? How do we balance love with truth?
Hot Topic #1- Homosexuality
The Conflict:
Homosexuality is out front in our world and culture. It’s not only presented as okay but it’s presented as normal. Homosexuality which is a minor part of our population (1.5%) is made to be seen as the dominating sexuality of our country. It’s on TV shows for all ages, its in our school, its in our movies, and for many of us its in our daily lives.
In an age where tolerance is preached and held up as the standard, homosexuality while pointing to tolerance as reason for it to be accepted will not tolerate any other view that opposes it. It often labels (not in a good way) and ostracizes people who oppose them and has even turned violent and destructive anyone who opposes it.
Anyone who opposes it is labeled narrow-minded, a bigot, guilty of a hate crime, non-tolerant, non-American, standing in the way of progress, anti-freedom, and the list goes on.
Yet scripture is clear that homosexuality is neither natural nor accepted, but is in fact sin. And like all other sin it is to be avoided. Yet scripture also teaches us to love one another. So what do we do?
Stop and ask yourself:
What do I believe about homosexuality? Where do you stand and why? How would you answer some one who says if your homosexual you’re not being tolerant or loving?
Square Peg in a Round Hole…Ouch
This past fall this issue was front and center in our nation. With the vote for Prop 8 we saw the ugliness of both sides emerge. While the proposition passed the issue is not over. This month the proposition will be challenged in California’s supreme court as unconstitutional.
Some who argue for the inclusion of homosexuals into mainstream culture argue that we have no right to tell others how to live, what is right or wrong. We are told the constitution guarantees this freedom, that all they want is equal status with married people when it comes to tax breaks, insurance and other civil rights enjoyed by heterosexual couples. Those against 8 argue that those for 8 are playing on fear and hate, that the law doesn’t do all they say it will.
Those who argue against recognizing homosexual couples as equal to heterosexual couples argue that their way of life and beliefs will be trampled in the name of freedom, tolerance, and inclusiveness. They argue that it destroys the very cornerstone of civilization- families.
Some of the implications they site are
- that homosexual life style will be included in school curriculum and they will not be able to opt their children out of that teaching.
- That religious institutions/personal beliefs will be trampled because they will be forced to recognize homosexuality as valid even if they do not believe it to be.
- Destroy our culture by undermining the family.
While none of these are spelled out in the proposition. A look around the country at other states that have made homosexual marriages legal and there are signs that it is moving beyond simple marriage benefits.
- Schools where students are taught that gay marriage is equally valid and normal as hetero marriage- parents have not been able to remove their kids from that class. In Massachusetts a court ruled that parents aren’t allowed to opt out or remove their children from class when homosexuality is presented. Influenced as early as kindergarten.
- Other objections are that it could leave clergy open to law suits if they refuse to marry a homosexual couple or to use their facility. Opponents say that’s not their aim, yet there are already laws suits against religious places for similar things in states where gay marriage is legal. Out east a wedding photographer was sued and forced to take pictures at a homosexual marriage even though it was against her beliefs.
Though the law may not say this, though they say there are other laws there to protect this from happening, the same things were sad in these other states and it has not been so.
The Heart of It All
What is the argument really about?
- It’s about who has the right to define what marriage is. The pro-homosexual movement see marriage as a legal, civil contract with no spiritual implications. Therefore marriage can and should be redefined.
The church sees marriage as something more than just a legal or civil thing.
Marriage is a covenant between God and 2 people, it symbolizes much deeper things- Christ union to the church. It is something that is to be permanent- two become one. It was established in Genesis immediately after creation.
- What is at work behind this and is att he heart of the issue is a war over worldview. It’s about whose worldview is right and should be used to determine and interpret life around them and what is right and wrong, truth and lies.
So what we have is one group, whose worldview says that homosexuality is normal, natural and should be accepted by all. They see marriage as a civil and legal issue that should be changed. While one the other side we have the church which says that homosexuality is not natural, that it is sin (Romans). Like all other sins we should avoid it because it does not lead to the kind oflife God intended or created us for. It also sees marriage as a covenant between two people and God with life-long implications, full of deep and spiritual meaning, and not something that should be changed.
Yet the church is also called to love everyone, including those it considers its enemies. The church is supposed to speak truth to the world whether its popular or not. It’s called to stand for the truth when others bow to popularity or pressure. But it is charged to speak the truth in love.
So while homosexuality is wrong how do we still reach out to people who need Jesus? How do we speak the truth in love to them? How do we stand for truth in a world that increasingly doesn’t want to hear our truth?
This is the tension we live in. So How do we do It?
When Families Fail Us?
Observations
What are our expectations for our families?
- To love us, support us, encourage us, to protect us, provide for us.
- To be a place of safety- from physical, verbal, mental, emotional and sexual abuse, a place to be who we are without having to pretend, to be heard, to be listened to, taken seriously, to be accepted, to be a place of healing, trust, forgiveness, places of stability, of guidance
- To be disciplined and corrected, to teach us about life, and God, nurture our faith in God
- To drive us where we need to go and to pick us up, to give us freedom, to give us money, to cook for us, clean up after us, buy us things
- For our parents to stay together
We all expect our families to be safe places where we are cared for, loved, nurtured, encouraged, and guided in life. We want them to be place of refuge where we can go after living iin a world of constant change.
Yet because of the pressures of life, the family in some cases is not the place of stability or safety it once was.
Families are under attack and things are shifting once again.
Pressures on the Family
- To maintain a certain life style/provide for the family
Where did this come from: Part of it is the myth of the American Drea: that everyone should own a big home in a good neighborhood, drive nice cars, own big screen TV’s, have all the latest gadgets. Our desire to keep up with everyone else has driven parents to work longer hours, multiple jobs, taking them out of the homes and spending less time with each other and their kids. The second affect of the long ours is that the stress of their lives is often taken out at home.
- Parents having to start over
Where does this come from: Marriages are under attack. Half of them don’t make it. So we have parents who are in their 30-40’s reliving their teenage years- dating, seeking out who they are. As a result many kids are having to be the parent to their parents. Instead of going to their parents for advice the parents are asking teens for their advice.
- Take advantage of the Opportunities:
Where did this come from: Myth that America is the Land of Opportunities. Many of your parents came here looking for a better life than what they had. So they come to America and without all the restrictions of other nations limitless opportunities lay at our feet. So there is this pressure that we must take advantage of every opportunity that comes our way. As a result we over commit, over schedule, and end up tired, stressed, and worn out. But have we ever asked the questions: Do I need to take up every opportunity? Which opportunities does God want me to say yes to, say no to?
- Passed on Expectations
Where does this come from: Some parents put their broken and unachieved dreams upon their kids. Pushing them to be what they couldn’t be or wish they had without ever asking if this what their son/daughter want. So kids are forced to live up to expectations they never asked for or are even equipped for. As a result there is often increased tension between parents and teens.
Jesus Understands Family Pressures and Failures
Jesus knows what its like to have family not understand who you are, to have expectations placed on you that you never asked for and don’t want. Jesus knows what its like to have parents who just don’t get it. In fact for a time Jesus had the expectations of a nation, hopes for centuries placed upon him. He knows what its like for families to be places other than places of safety, security, acceptance, and love.
Matthew 12:46-50- Who is my mother, brother?
They came not to bring Him home to celebrate but they thought he was wacky, needing the padded room.
Matthew 13:53-58- prophet without honor in his home town
They said we know you- and you can’t be this. Its like the “I remember when you were little and you did…” People quickly want to pigeon hole us based on who we were.
John 2:1-11- water to wine.
Jesus comment of “women why do you involve me.” They did not understand who He was.
Luke 2:41-51- Jesus stays at the temple while his parents go hom
Though they had this supernatural interaction with angels at his conception, the promises made about him, his parents still don’t get who he is.
Throw on top of these all the whispers of the crowds about Him being the one and wanting to make him king, to wanting to stone him.
So What IF Jesus Knows What It’s Like To Be Us:
The reason we need to know this is because it reveals the truth of Heb 4:14-16,. Jesus knows what we’re going through and because He has He knows what we need. He knows what to ask the Father for us even when we don’t. Jesus knows what we need and therefore we can come to Him.
We Can Look Where HE Looked:
Jesus always kept His eyes on the Father. God the FAtehr was not like our earthly Fathers and Mothers. Where they fall short God does not.
- Where our families don’t always know who we are or see us for who we are becoming God does. Ps 139:13-14, Luke 12:7 God know us. He formed us, He knows how many hairs are on your head.
- Where our families sometimes put expectations on us that we can’t meet because we aren’t those people. God knows exactly who we are and what we can do because he created us, He created us with a purpose in Life. Jer 29:11. God knows the plans He has for us. In fact He has said He will lead us into these plans. We hear it in Jesus call to come follow Him.
- Where it can seem our familes’ love is based on how well we do. God’s love is unconditional and full all the time. In fact God loved us while we were still sinners. Romans 5:8. John 3:!6- God loved the world and sent us. Paul writes in Eph 3:18-19 about this amazing Depth of God’s love.
- Where our families sometimes let us down and aren’t there for us. God has promised He will never leave us, that He is always with us, Heb 13:5. IN fact he has given us His Spirit, the Spirit of God, the Holy Spirit to come and guide and be our promise of his presence, John 16:5-16
Our families, no matter how hard they try will fail and let us down as some point. When that happens, when our families aren’t what we expect or need them to be, there is some one we can go to. We can go to Jesus in prayer and ask for help, for comfort, for strength to get through (it’s his promise). We can look to His and our Father in Heaven and discover in Him what we are lacking in our families.
When Friends Disappoint Us
Observations:
What do we do when friends disappoint us? What goes through your mind- anger, bitterness, sadness? What does it feel like?
Disappointments come in many varieties and degrees. They range from them not calling or texting us back to betrayal of secrets, not having our back or siding with our enemies.
Reality: At some point in your life your friends will disappoint you to some degree. No matter how close or strong the friendship is, even in marriage, your friends will fail you in some degree. It’s not necessarily because they don’t like you. It’s because they aren’t perfect and no person or group of people can be all we need them to be all the time.
The only person who can be all we need to be at all times is Jesus Christ. But can we say that Jesus has disappointed us? Can the one who is perfect, who loves perfectly disappoint us? We’ll look at this in a couple weeks.
But for now what do we do when friends disappoint us?
Look At Jesus
Jesus understands betrayal from friends. At Jesus’ greatest moment of need his friendship, people he poured his life into for 3 years, everyday, all day, failed him, left him, betrayed him.
Let’s look at this series of failures:
In the Garden of Gesemenie Jesus’ own disciple are to tired to stay awake. Twice Jesus finds them sleeping. While he’s crying tears of blood, his disciples lay on the ground passed out and drooling.
Judas betrays Jesus to the priests for 30 pieces of silver. He brings the guards right to him. In arresting Jesus, Judas takes the sign of an intimate friendship and uses it to betray Jesus- with a kiss.
Rather than go with Him, his disciple all split, run. Even Peter who follows at a distance for a time denies his relationship with Jesus 3 times and eventually runs.
His own people, the ones He cam e to save, the ones who should have recognized Him for who He was- the messiah, Son of God, betray him and have him hung on a cross.
At the cross all only a small few are on hand to witness his death
Jesus: Mission of Vengeance or Mercy?
Jesus had every right to curse them, to leave them, to start all over, to punish them, to never talk to them again. Who would have blamed them. In our movies Jesus would come back and kill every single person who deserted him. Anyone who betrayed him would be running for their life.
Instead Jesus has forgiven them. At the cross Jesus asks God the Father to forgive them and everyone involved in his death. Ultimately Jesus cry of forgiveness was for the forgiveness of the whole world, for all who would come to him.
And this forgiveness is just the beginning. Jesus does come back. Jesus does seek them out. But when he finds them he doesn’t destroy them, doesn’t scold them, doesn’t beat them, does guilt them, doesn’t point out their failures. In the greatest shock He comes to encourage them, to build them up, to strengthen them. Instead of ending their relationship Jesus restores and strengthens it!
That’s Not Right! Where’s the Justice!
Now if we were writing this script we would want blood, justice, and retribution. The way the Jesus finishes this story-we would be saying this doesn’t make sense! What about all they had done! What about all their failures and betrayals! They don’t deserve this kind of treatment! This isn’t right! This isn’t fair! Where’s the justice!
Jesus and the kingdom He was bringing doesn’t operate like the world. For Jesus justice had been met by his death on the cross. Everything they had done, all their betrayals and failures, their sins, had been forgiven on the cross. On the cross the love of Jesus overwhelms and conquers.
Yet as Christians you and I are called to follow Jesus, to be like Him which includes becoming like him in how we react to people and friends who fail and disappoint us. And Jesus has shown us that the way to deal with disappointments isn’t to run, ignore, give the cold shoulder, scold, be bitter, make people pay, but to forgive.
FORGIVENESS
The hardest thing in our culture to do is to forgive. We all want others to forgive us but we are so reluctant to forgive. Yet the way to overcome the failures of others, the way to move on with our lives, to find joy, peace and hope again is through the hard and sometimes lonely road of forgiveness.
Why is forgiveness so hard for us?
1. It messes with our sense of justice. Justice requires wrongs be put right, some one to be punished
a. For there to be justice we want eye for an eye, tooth for tooth. That is how our world operates and look what it’s accomplished- war after war, divisions and walls between people, races, nations.
b. The message we’re told from birth is if some one does something to you repay them in a greater way. We’re led to believe that repaying evil for evil is right, that it will some how make things right. Don’t 2 wrongs make a right?
2. It leads to loss of face, shame, and makes one look weak.
a. To not respond is seen as weakness, failure, brings shame to one self and family, to be a loser, to declare the other right, and the winner. To respond saves us face, prove we can stand on our own, proves we’re tough, that we can’t be walked on or pushed around.
3. It takes away power for ourselves
a. We like to withhold forgiveness because we feel in control in the relationship. It gives us powering the relationship. It makes us look good if we maintain the relationship.
b. We like having things on people because then they owe us one.
Why We Should Forgive:
1. The Lord has commanded us to.
a. This is not an option for believers. We are not told to forgive if we feel like it or if its convenient. We aren’t told there’s some stuff you can forgive and other stuff you shouldn’t. We’re told to forgive everyone for everything. Our reason for this is that Jesus has forgiven us of everything.
b. One of the most powerful marks of following Christ is our ability to forgive.
2. The love of Christ includes forgiveness.
a. In our call to be like Christ is to love like Him. His love doesn’t have the option to not forgive. Forgiveness is required by Jesus love for us based on who we are, his creation, not for what we have done or will do for Him. It’s what we mean when we say Jesus love is unconditional.
3. Forgiveness restores our ability to worship God
a. Scripture is clear that if we have issues with others, if we need to forgive or we need to ask some one to forgive us then any worship we offer will not be acceptable to God. To worship and praise a God who desires unity, peace, and one body- for there to be divisions is hypocrisy.
b. But nowhere does it mean the other person must or will forgive us. Our responsibility is to ask for forgiveness or to forgive. The other person’s response is not on us.
4. Forgiveness restore relationships with people
a. When we forgive we remove obstacles from our relationship with people. It restores relationships.
5. Forgiveness frees us to move on
a. Forgiveness removes the power of bitterness from our lives. Forgiveness allows us to move on in life and not be held captured by the past.
I’m Not The Student I Should Be
Observations
Life is full of disappointments.
We’ve all been disappointed by life, by others, or by ourselves.
The question isn’t whether we will be disappointed, but the question is what do we do when they come? How will we react to it?
The reality is that life will not always go as we plan no matter how carefully we plan it, no matter how hard we try to control our life and everyone and everything in it, life will throw us curves.
Think About This:
• When was the last time you felt disappointed by life, a person, God?
• How do you react when life disappoints you?
• Why do you react like you do to disappointments?
• Do you think God cares about the disappointments in your life? Why?
• Does the Bible give you any help with disappointments you face?
There are basically 3 ways of dealing with disappointments:
1. Perfectionist. These types expect life to go as planned. They believe if they are careful, plan accordingly they can make sure life goes as they want. They tend to be surprised/shocked when life doesn’t go as they planned or some one lets them down. When things don’t go as planned these people tend to get mad at others or mad at themselves. If something goes wrong then some one must be at fault. They try to be perfect at all they do. Tend to take disappointments personal.
2. I Give Up. The other extreme: life is nothing but one big disappointment. These people don’t bother trying because no matter what happens life will go wrong so why try. They tend to feel defeated by life. Not motivated in life. Also take disappointments personal but in a passive way.
3. Middle Grounders. These middle types tend to live with the expectation that life may or may not go right. Tend to live by the standard of hope for the best but expect the worse. They go into situations hoping for the best of people, the situation, etc but aren’t surprised when life doesn’t go as planned. Tend to not take disappointments personal.
Where would you place yourself on the line below?
Why did you place yourself where you did on the line above?
SCHOOL- I’m Just Not That Smart
There is nothing harder in life than admitting you’re not as good as you think you are or others expect you should be.
There is nothing more humbling than to realize that as hard as you try you still can’t be all that others want you to be.
Many of us live our lives trying to be what others tell us they want us to be, or trying to be what we think others want us to be.
School is one area where the expectations placed upon us by parents, peers, and culture merely set us up for disappointments.
Ponder this:
• What expectations do your parents place on you for school? What are their expectations? ( Is there a GPA, SAT score you must get? Is there an expected college to get into, career to choose)
• What do your friends expect from you in school?
• What does your culture expect from you in school?
• How do you feel about all these expectations? Are they fair? Are they reasonable? Are they Godly?
There is no way we can live up to all these expectations because to do so would mean we would have to live almost a perfect life and we know that’s not possible.
Many of your parents expect you to do well. But what is well? Is it a 3.5, 4.0, 4.5, or is it the college you get into? Maybe it’s to do better than your cousin.
• No matter how many classes one takes, tutors you see, studying one does its possible to always be a B student or suck at math or English. What do we do then?
Between friends there is an expectation to do well, especially if they are all doing well. Even between good friends there’s competition for who’s smarter.
• The truth is that there will always be some one better, smarter, faster, and stronger than us. What do you do when we encounter the one who better? Where does that leave you?
Being Asian our culture assumes your going to be good at math and science. But how real is that? If you’re not good at math or science does that mean you’ve let some one down or that you are somehow less Asian than the next person?
• Not every Asian person is born a math geniuses or science guru. Some will struggle in these classes while excelling in English and the arts. What then? Do we ignore what we’re good at to fit into some one else’s expectations?
On top of this there is the pressure to be top in your class because the top people are the ones who get the scholarships, go to the “good” colleges.
The Reality:
How real is it to try to live up to everyone else’s expectations of who we should be, how well we should do in school? Is it even possible? Should we even want to?
Do we lose something when we try to be who everyone else wants us to be?
What does Jesus have to say about this?
• What are Jesus’ expectations for you in school and life?
• What does the God say about who we are?
• Who determines our future?
1 Cor 10:31 What Jesus expect from us? Why?
• Jesus wants us to do our best- but not for our glory, not for the sake of getting in a good school, or being able to brag to our friends or family. Our good is to be done to bring Him glory.
Mark 8:34-36 What does it mean to gain the whole world and lose your soul? How does this apply to the previous verse? How does this apply to school?
• Jesus wants us to do well in school, but not at the expense that we ignore people, miss out on people who need Jesus and whom God is wanting to send you to. Our primary purpose in life, in all settings, is to follow Jesus and He’s here to make disciples, call people from death to life.
Phil 1:6 and Matthew 5:48 Are these two verses in conflict? Are we to be perfect or not?
• Because we are not perfect it does not excuse us from trying to be perfect. But we are to do this with much grace, realizing we will never be perfect until Christ, not us, brings it about in our lives. If we try to be perfect on our own we will never get there, its not humanly possible. Only with Jesus can we see our lives getting closer and closer. This also takes us out of judgment seat of others who fall short because our perfection is not a result of anything we have done, it’s a gift of God’s grace.
• Even in the call to perfection is the call to be like our Heavenly Father, to follow Him.
PS 139:14-16, 1 Cor 12:12 What does this say about who we are, about who God created us to be?
• God created us to be exactly who we are. God knows our strengths, our weaknesses, our limits, and our gifts. God created us just as he wanted for the purpose he wanted. God has a plan for each of us that he created us for and for that purpose we are perfectly gifted.
Luke 12:4-7 Who is the one person’s opinion about us we should care about and why? How does this help us handle the expectations of others?
• We will ultimately be held accountable before God with what we did with our lives, not our parents, friends or culture. We will be judged at the end for what we did, how we lived.
Jer 29:11-14, Proverbs 16:9, Eph 2:10 What does this say about our future? Does it mean we don’t have to do anything?
The Lord is the only one who determines our future. God alone knows what He has for us. God alone determines our future. But it does no mean we sit back and do nothing. When combined with the other truths it means when we follow Jesus, seek to make him known where ever we are, when we do our best to bring Him glory, when we pay attention to those around us, we will discover our future was never in doubt.
Heart of the Matter
When we realize in the deepest part of our being, in our heart, soul and mind that we are created exactly as God designed us to be. When we realize not one of us is perfect and that God loves us perfectly. When we know in our deepest part of us that our future is secure in Christ, that He has created us as He did so we can do exactly what He has destined for us (though his future may not look like what we imagined- but its still the best for us) We will find ourselves wanting to follow Jesus more because He’s got the keys to our future. We will also discover we are free to enjoy school. We are free to do our best and if that’s not perfection we can be okay with that knowing that, in fact we can be more than just okay, we can be content. Because our imperfection will not change how God sees us, loves us or the future He has for us.
You’ve Got To Live It!
TEL-Living It
All this spending time and effort with God and trying to understand his word is all useless unless it actually impacts our life and changes who we are and how we live.
Most people out there, while they have a negative image of Christians, have never met or don’t know any Christians. Their opinions are shaped by the media and the culture around them.
Questions to Chew On:
- Do your friends know you’re a Christian?
- Would they be shocked to find out you are?
- On a scale of 1-10, 10 being completely different, how much do you stand out from your friends because of your lifestyle?
- In what ways does your life look just like your friends?
- In what ways does your life look different?
What Kind of Tree Are You?
Luke 6:43-49
Jesus spends a lot of time talking about trees. He seems to compare people, you and I, to trees. Jesus repeatedly says you can tell a lot about a tree by looking at the fruit it produces. If it’s a lemon tree it should produce lemons. Apple trees produce apples. If we say we are followers of Jesus then our lives should outwardly reflect what we say we believe on the inside.
We may stand and call out to the Lord in worship, but the real fruit is how do we treat people outside of worship? How do we live when we’re not worshipping?
Phil 1:6 and 2 Cor 3:18 state that our lives should increasingly look more like Jesus. We should see the fruits of the spirit operate more and more in our lives. We should become more loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled (Gal 5:22).
Matt 7:15-23
If a tree says it’s an apple tree but produces lemons then its not an apple tree. Same with us. If we say we are followers of Jesus yet our lives carry none of the marks of Jesus then we have to ask the hard question: Am I really a follower of Jesus? Jesus writes that some people will come before Jesus and say did I not do all this stuff in your name and he will tell them I didn’t know you.
James 1:19-27
James picks up on this idea and says if you say you’re a follower but you don’t do what the Word says you’re deceiving yourself. But blessing come for those who live out what they believe. James finishes this section talking about what honors God. Its not how busy or involved we are at church or what good grades we get. It’s whether we put our words and beliefs into actions. Looking after the poor, widows, orphans, in other words the one who sits alone at lunch, the one no one wants to be around, the one trying to get into your group, the one picked on. James also says its about keeping control of their tongue, in other words do we use our words to build up or tear down, do we use the Lord’s name in inappropriate ways, do we curse and swear, and lastly we should keep from being polluted by the world. In other words its about what we do for the least, the lost, the lonely, and about being different than the world, not seeing how close we can get to being like the world but still be “Christian”.
OT
This isn’t just in the New Testament. This is at the heart of the Old Testament. Israel gets in trouble not for failing to sacrifice to God. They get in trouble with God for not carrying out the heart of what it means to follow him- to look out for the least, lost, and lonely. Yes they are very religious in their actions- they make a lot of sacrifices and hold all the festivals, but its not coming from the heart. A relationship wasn’t just about doing a bunch of stuff so God’s off your back or on your side. The heart of the gospel has always been about people- reaching out and loving them. Most of the laws of the OT had to do with how we treated one another, how we love and care for one another. Israel thought as long as they keep the sacrifices and the letter of the law they could neglect people and pursue their own agenda- riches, power, and glory. They were wrong and found themselves in exile again, slaves again.
Reflection Stuff
- What kind of tree do you want to be? What kind are you?
- How did you live out your faith today? This week?
- Did how you live today help people see Jesus better or did it get in the way?
Weeds and Pests
What keeps us from living out what we believe?
- Fear of standing out
- Fear of what others may think
- Easier to blend in
- May not get what we want
It’s Hard to Live For Jesus in Public
Mark 13:13, John 15-18:21, Matthew 10:16-20,
You will be hated because of me. Jesus doesn’t deny that following him won’t be popular with the world. He knows this full well. He lived this out and eventually paid the ultimate price, his life. He knows what you are going through. You are not alone in this. Therefore when you go to Jesus in prayer you can be sure that Jesus knows what its like. Jesus also knows what you will need to get through it. Jesus knows what you need so you can stand up.
Romans 8:31-35, 2 Cor 4:7-11, 12:9-10
Paul points out that when we are persecuted He will be with you, he will strengthen and help you. In Hebrews we are told we have a priest, Jesus, who knows what we are going through because He’s gone through it to. So when you come to Him come with confidence, you’re praying to some one who knows what its like, what you are going through. He also knows what to ask the Father on your behalf.
Pulling Out the Weeds
We need to realize that following Jesus is not going to be easy. Jesus never promised it would be, Jesus never said people will treat you like royalty because of me. Jesus never says you’ll never know hardships in this life. And some of us have this thinking that following Jesus will be easy. We need to get rid of that thinking. We need to go through life knowing that standing for him may cost us stuff so that when it does we aren’t surprised and so when it doesn’t we can rejoice and be thankful.
Acts 5:40-42
The disciples came back to the church, to the body of Christ and they rejoiced over their sufferings. What’s our attitude? When we are persecuted for our faith do we come in here rejoicing that we were worthy? Or do we come in with our heads hanging, shocked, or disappointed?
Why is there response so different than ours? We’ve fallen into thinking our life should be easy, trouble free, safe, and everyone should love us. But this isn’t real life, this isn’t even close to reality. Life isn’t easy, trouble free, safe, and you won’t be liked by all whether you’re a Christian or not, this is reality or everyone.
Keeping Close to the Father
John 15
There is a picture of remaining in God. We cannot bear the fruit of God on our own. When we remain in God he empowers us through his spirit to bear fruit, to become like him.
When we stay close to God, in his Word, with his people, and in his love we discover that even though life isn’t easy or fair we can face life with confidence. Why because we realize that even though life isn’t easy we know we have a Father in heaven who loves us, who promises to never leave us, who has been through what we are going through and knows and promises to help us find the strength to stand for Him. Staying close to God reminds us that real life begins after this life on earth is over. We realize that we can put up with some rough times now because we are not alone in this, we can be confident our faith is true and true for all because its comes from the God who is truth, the God who made us and knows how we are created to live. We are also reminded that we will spend eternity with God, that at the end God will declare to the world I am who I said I was!
Will you stand on God’s truth and in His power, with the confidence to face whatever the world may throw because you’re not alone. Or will you despair, bury your head and hide?
Effort
T-Time
E-Effort
Not only does our relationship with Jesus take time. But it takes effort. This effort comes in two main ways. The first of which we look at this week
Effort For Our Walk As Individuals and As A Community
Let’s face it. It takes effort to spend time with God, to force yourself to withdraw from the distractions, needs and to do list of our lives. It takes effort to turn off the computer, the TV, the game counsel. It takes effort to get ready to come to church to spend time with God’s big family. It takes effort to get stuff done so you can come. It takes effort to be the body of Christ.
But Let’s Look Closer At the Effort It Takes to Know Jesus More
It takes effort to not see spending time with Jesus as yet another thing to do or as homework. When we do homework we become clock watchers- task completers. We focus more on getting the job done and we miss the journey, and we can esily let that seep into our time with Jesus.
It takes effort to keep your mind focused on what it needs to focus on. It takes effort to quiet the voices in your head- worries, anxieties, stresses, family, friends, future, past, and more. It takes effort to really read God’s word, to listen to God, and to pray.
God’s Word-The Bible
“The B I B L E. Yes that’s the book for me. I stand alone on the Word of God.” Many of us have sung that song when we were young.
Let’s be real. A lot of us don’t understand the Bible when we read it. We don’t really stand on it. It talks about stuff that happened long ago, about people who don’t seem to be like us, people who are kings, peasants, slaves, wars, battles, famines, exile, miracles, visions, big words, complicated names, and farm talk.
Many of us aren’t excited to read the Bible. Many of us, if we admit it open the Bible with a sigh (I know I used to) because we think here I go reading more about things that don’t make sense to me. If that’s you you’re not alone.
For me it didn’t change until I realized reading the Bible takes effort. It wasn’t until people told me and showed me that there were resources out there to help me understand it.
I also discovered I was without excuse especially after people told me and showed me these resources that are there. Though you won’t understand everything you read because some of it comes from life experiences and the extent you live out your faith. The internet has made it possible for you to understand the Bible in ways that once required you either going to a library (and let’s be honest how many of us like going to libraries), or spend money on huge books. With the internet many of these resources are now available on line, from the comfort of your home.
Now using these resources takes time and practice. If you’re like I was you’ll fumble through them at the start but the more you use them and engage with them the better you’ll use them, the more you’ll learn, the more you’ll begin to understand God’s Word.
Some resources out there are: (note the resources are helpful but not the only final and only authority)
Commentaries: Try to explain the passages. Often they are a theologian (some one who studies God) thought on passages based on research, the history of the book and times it was written in.
Be aware that this is still some one’s interpretation. So they do not know everything about a passage. God’s word is deep, having many meanings. Commentaries help us get an idea what a passage is about and if what we think it is saying is in the ballpark.
How to use this: Go to a commentary after you have wrestled with the text and either have an idea what it means. Use it as a check to make sure you’re in the general area. Or go to it after some real wrestling with it and still are clueless to help you see what you may have missed. If you came up with something that a commentary doesn’t- it does not mean you are wrong. Is what you think supported elsewhere in the Bible- if so you’re in the ballpark. If it contradicts something elsewhere in the Bible chances are you have be off. If you’re still confused contact a pastor or talk with your parents.
Hint: Look at several different commentaries. This helps you get a feel for the passage.
Concordances: Lists where every word in the Bible is are used.
Be aware that often the language the Bible was written in doesn’t always translate the same in English. For example love in English is one word. In Greek there are 3 different words for love with different meanings. In English we tell the difference by the context we used them.
Concordances help to see how an author uses a word. If a passage talks about fruit. You can look up fruit and see if it’s used in other places in the book and how its used. Then you can look in other books by the author to see how they use it there and then expand to the OT or NT and then the entire Bible. If an author uses it differently in another book perhaps he’s trying to draw a contrast or if it’s found elsewhere in the Bible maybe the author is alluding back to it wanting to draw it out now.
Hint: Always work inside out. Always start in the same book you’re reading to see how a word or idea is used. Then expand out to other books by the same author if any, then to whatever testament the book was found in and then to the whole Bible.
Dictionaries: Tries to tell you how a word is used in scripture.
Be aware that this is not an exhaustive or final way it’s used.
Dictionaries try to tell you how the word is used in the Bible. Because Greek and Hebrew don’t always translate the same in English the word can be used differently in different passages to help get a fuller understanding of the word and what it means and how other aspects of that word may also be at play in the verse you are looking at.
Encyclopedia: Gives you information on a topic, person, place
Be aware that these are not usually super detailed. They usually try to give you a general understanding of the topic, place, person, or word.
Encyclopedias are helpful if you want to know more about a person, city, or topic. If you want to know who the Pharisees were and what they believed or who the Sadducees were and what they believed this can be a helpful resource.
History: There are sites and book that will try to help you understand the culture of the times and the books. Understanding the time can help you understand what the author was saying to his/her audience and then better apply it to your life or situation.
Websites
Site with most of the above resources.
(1) http://bible.christianity.com/references/ This site has all of the above resources there. Good general resource sites.
Calvin’s Commentary
(2) http://www.ccel.org/ccel/calvin/commentaries.i.html
Bible Intro Material: This site will help you have a general understanding of the book you are reading, the author, themes in the book, and place or people they are writing to.
Maps: Sometimes its good to see where they are or are traveling to.
(3) http://dev.bible.org/drupal/intro Link to net.bible with maps and such
How to Put It All Together
Helps for reading God’s Word:
- Read a book. The pick-a-random-verse is okay but not the best way to grow deeper.
- Know the background of the book: Who wrote it and what do we know about it? Was it written to anyone in particular? When? Where on earth was it? What is the book about? Do you know anything that was happening around then? (3)
- Set aside a chunk of time-quality time.
- Take time to quiet yourself/prepare yourself. Write down any concerns, anxieties, worries you have as a way of giving them to God.
- Pray for wisdom from the Holy Spirit to understand and apply what you read.
- Read- not necessarily a chapter but till a thought is finished. (our headings and chapters don’t always match with a complete thought.) Don’t be afraid to reread a passage several times, especially if it doesn’t make sense or if the verse gets stuck in your head. If you find your mind wandering- surrender to God what God it off track and go back and reread.
- Look up any words, names, or places you don’t know. Remember your mind needs to be engaged. Anything/word you don’t know don’t just skip it- look it up and find out what it means or who he/she is. (1)
- What is this passage about? What’s the main point(s) Check your thoughts by: comparing with the rest of the Bible- is this contrary to anything else in scripture? Check with some commentaries to see if you’re in the right area (1) and (2). Remember commentaries do not hold all the answers. The word of God is active and deep. They can help you know if you’re in the right area.
- 9. What is God saying to you through this passage? If nothing comes- spend the time you need to take what you read apply to your life, relationship with God and other. You may have to reread the passage. You may have to wrestle in prayer for God to show you. Remember your relationship with God takes Time and Effort and God promises his word never return empty.
What do you discover about God that you didn’t before?
- What does that mean to you- what would it mean to live out that understanding of God today?
- What are you reminded about God? Are you living that out? If so what does it look like? If not what might it look like? How can you do that today? How does this help you in your situation?
What do discover about what yourself?
- Does this passage challenge you? If so how? What is it asking you to do or give up or change? How will you do this today in your life?
- Does this passage encourage you? How? What will this look like in your life?
How does this passage speak to your situation?
- Does this relate to anything I am going through now? If so what? How should I live in response to this? How can I do this today?
10. Pray over the things God has shown you. Ask Him to help you live what you have read. Ask Him to help you live it out.
Helps for Hearing God.
It takes effort to learn to hear God’s voice. It takes practice. It takes a willingness to wrestle with God and to pursue Him until He gives you peace- inner peace. You may still be conflicted because the word you may have received will ask you to put yourself out there, to stretch you, but in the midst of that you sense and know peace. It means willing to step out and do what you think and then depending on how it works out you know whether that was his voice or yours and it helps enforce a voice or rule out it. It also helps when we spend time in God’s word because we learn what he is about and his voice will never conflict with his word. So if we ask a question God can pull from scripture to reveal his will to us if we know it. If we don’t know it he can’t use it.
It is not that God does not speak. It is that we are not tuned into his voice.
Steps, Helps to hearing God.
- Know what you want to ask.
- Spend time in the word…
- Ask for the HS to help you hear
- Take time to quiet yourself. (deal with all your worries, stresses, anxieties that come to you mind as you wait)
- Writing can help- write down your worries as a way of naming them and giving them to God.
- When you think you heard God ask for peace.
- Be aware of what your needs/desires are and give them to God, make them known, but be willing to let go of them if its not Him.
- Does it conflict with His word, with who he is? If Yes not His voice. If no- could be his voice
- Is there inner peace- can still be uneasy because of what it asks you but is there peace?
10. Do it
11. Evaluate. Did it work out? Was it God’s voice? If Yes then you know which voice to listen to. If No then you have eliminated a voice.
Challenge of the Week
Practice using these resources. Pick out a book of the Bible, maybe a shorter one like one of Paul’s smaller letters or one of the prophets of the OT. You can also apply it to a book you’re already reading.
Time and Silence
T_Time
Conflicted
There’s a battle in our culture. It’s a battle between instant results and things that take time.
We don’t want to spend time doing anything. We want instant results and when we don’t get them we move on, get mad, or give up. The internet and texting tell us everything should be done in nanoseconds, TV tells us sicknesses can be cured in a 30 minutes, crimes solved in an hour, friendship formed in and instant.
Yet we also realize that learning to be good at anything requires time.
Think of the time we invest in other things: School-35 hours/week, Homework-10 hours/week, internet-14 hours/week, sports/clubs/hobbies-10 hours a week.
God: maybe 5 hours if we go to fellowship and Sunday service and school plus maybe 1 more hour the rest of the week.
Cannot get anywhere in your faith/relationship with God without putting in time. In fact you can’t get anywhere in life without putting in time.
If everything else requires us to invest time in it why do we expect our faith to be any different?
Quality and Engaged
Spending time with God has two components
1. Quality of the time we spend. If we have quality time with God we will take whatever time we need.
But it’s not about spending just a quantity of time, it’s about the quality of the time we spend. But what makes it quality? Are we focused on God, on what we’re reading, willing to wait till we hear from God, ready to wrestle, to not close the Word till we understand? Or are we thinking of everything else we have to do that day, worried about a test, a project, a club, or about what a friends said, an argument with parents, watching the clock till we can move on. Is the time we spend quality time?
2. It’s about being engaged and focused on God while we’re with Him.
The time we spend with God is not turn off your brain time either. The time we invest with God should engage our senses, our minds. It’s something that’s active not passive. It requires us to be aware, active, engaged, and attentive.
Think about your friendships you already have. Do they require time? Can you shut off your brain when you’re with them? Do they require you to be silent and listen to them? Do you have to talk to them?
If all this is true of our earthly relationships why do we expect it to be any different with our relationship with Jesus?
What Does It Take?
The truth with most of us is that to spend 5-10 minutes with God is not quality time. We are probably thinking about what’s next, what we need to do, or what’s in the day ahead or going through the events of the day.
The truth is it takes most of us 5-10 minutes just to empty our minds of the cares of the day so we can focus on God. Our goal is to be fully present when you’re with God (or anyone for that matter). All of our us should be focused on God. If you’re going to spend time with God then be all there.
Jesus set the example for us, because he knows us, He modeled what it looks like to spend time with God. Open up to: Luke 5:16, Mark 1:35,
1. We need to get away from, to be okay with silence.
The first part of spending time is for us to be okay with silence. Jesus withdrew to a quiet place. We need to get away from the distractions of our lives. Turn off the computer, TV, ipods, turn of cell phones, etc. We need to literally unplug from the distraction of life.
Our culture doesn’t like silence. You can’t go anywhere without hearing music being piped into the place or TVs on the wall going. Yet silence is essential to our relationship with God. Especially when we are learning to hear and discern God’s voice.
Listening to worship music has its place and time. But even then we need to spend some time in silence to focus, to refocus.
2. We need to take all the time we need to hear from God, to understand what we read, to wrestle with God when we are needing direction or help.
How do we do this? How do we begin to spend quality time with God?
- Unplug from life- turn off computers, TV’s, ipods, phones, etc.
- Begin with prayer- asking HS to open our heart, minds, and spirit to understand what we read, to hear what he whispers, to apply it to our lives.
- Spend some time centering yourself in prayer- giving God those things on your mind, your worries, your anxieties, etc until you are present with God, present to the moment fully.
- Engage- reading Bible, prayer, worship, silence,
- Reflect on what you have read, heard and apply to your life now.
Think About This
Many of us are busy doing good things. But in our doing a great many good things could we be missing out on the one or few things God intends for us to be great at?
Jesus when ministering in a town, healing, casting out demons, etc withdraws to spend time with God to refocus. The disciples find him and say hey everyone’s looking for you- your popular, famous, your moment to shine. Jesus response is let’s move on to the next town. Most of us would stay and bask in the glory and fame, why move on when you have it all?
Jesus knew what he had said yes to- proclaiming the kingdom to God to everyone. So he was able to say no to other things- staying put and enjoying fame and praise.
We never hear Jesus saying he’s stressed, too busy, or freaking out. Jesus knew what he had said yes to so he could say no to the other things.
What about you? Do you know what God wants you to say yes to so you can say no to the other things?
This Week’s Challenge: Increase Your Time With God!
Saturday- 10 minutes, Sunday 20 minutes (church doesn’t count), Monday 30 minutes, Tuesday 40 minutes, Wednesday 50 minutes, Thursday 60 minutes
Yes this looks hard- it sis. But you will not stumble or fall into holiness or a closer relationship with Jesus. Any relationship requires an investment of time.